“I keep dreaming about you. It always takes me by surprise when I so long to see you again while I am awake, that you, so badly wish to see me as well…but you discovered a way to visit me in my dreams. I wonder if I visit you in yours. I wonder if and when I do, you wake up feeling a loss, the loss that I feel, waking up without you. We fall asleep together in a dream and all I wish is to wake up next to your face, your chest, one of your hands on my side and the other in my hair, one of your legs between and one atop mine. I miss those mornings more than I felt it was possible to miss anything. I miss it, because I know that if distance wasn’t the magnet that won its battles over us, we would still be waking up like that. We wouldn’t need to meet in dreams because we’d be dreaming on the same pillow, underneath the same blankets. I don’t want to meet you halfway anymore, I want us to go to a place we’ve never been and form a life outside the life we labelled ‘acceptable’ or ‘ordinary.’ I don’t want to prove anything to anyone, I don’t want to question what my guts are telling me, I don’t want to know of your existence if I am not with you. I want to forget you completely if these miles can’t gradually cease. I believe in you and I don’t believe in much of anything or anyone. You are so inhumanly beautiful that I cannot encompass myself in the words to tell you how much I want to see you again, how much I want your arms wrapped around my waist, how much I want to believe in love and unearth it in you. I want to pinpoint the one soft spot on your heart and know it’s marked in invisible ink with my name, I want to know that when you look at me it glows and I can vaguely see it through the nearly transparent skin on your chest. You are so inhumanly beautiful that I cannot breathe for the first minute of your company. Every time I see you. Every time for nearly three years. You would imagine admiration would rust away, or wear off, or wipe away like dust on a coffee table. You are so inhumanly beautiful that when you call and I hear your voice on the other end I can barely manage to make myself say how much I’ve been missing you. Why do I dream of you so often? It nearly cripples me for days when I realize I don’t know when I will see you next. When I wake up and realize, I need you. I need you not because I cannot stand up alone, I need you because my heartbeat is irregular when I am not with you. I can fully function without you. I can do anything I’d normally do without you. I can breathe without you. I can go on without you. But I’d really love it if I didn’t have to. You are so inhumanly beautiful that I mistake you as delicate and fragile. I don’t want you to slip through my fingers. But I can only clench my fingers together so tightly before the water seeps through.
The water is you.”

Technicality: Yearn for, long for, ache for.